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Married for the First Time at Fifty (Week 6)

WEEK 6 (Mar 24, 2018):

We sat for our first professional couples portraits Saturday at church—a fundraiser for American Heritage Girls.

“Scared to death”


“He’s CRAZY”


After sitting for the pictures we went down to the Verizon store to get new phones. I had a troublesome hand-me-down iPhone 5, which Dean teased was an iPhone 1. His Samsung was old enough to be frustrating him too. They had a buy-one-get-one deal for the Galaxy S-9’s and a deal on a tablet for him to help with some aspects of his real estate job. (I finally got to take advantage of a BOGO outside of the grocery store!)

That night I began acquainting myself with the new phone. As I pondered the immense differences between Android and iPhone, I delighted in the fact that I was now on my husband’s cell phone plan.

I was on a FAMILY plan. Finally, it was my turn to belong to someone, (beside my parents and siblings).

As I played with my new phone, we remembered that we had passed our one-month anniversary without any fanfare. We were sad for 10 seconds, then we relished the fact that we had taken the plunge.

*           *           *

Monday we went to Biloxi, Mississippi, for Dean’s 50th birthday and a second mini-honeymoon.

(Beau Rivage lobby)

(View from our room)

The Beau Rivage Resort & Casino is his ‘happy place’.

While dating, his ninety-year-old mother had once told me she taught the whole family how to play craps, so it wasn’t a surprise. We were on our way to a family event when she told me.

Dean said, “You might as well get out now, if you have a problem with gambling.”

I jokingly tested the door handle, but it was locked. And we were travelling at full speed on a highway. Even so, it did give me a pause. I’d been down that road before.

It did not go well.

Over two decades ago I had dated a gambling addict. Without all the lies and manipulation, I knew it was just for fun and not a problem for Dean. Thankfully, he doesn’t have the addictive personality trait. His Myers-Briggs personality trait ISFP is known as the Adventurer, which includes riskier behavior like gambling and surfing, but are known to be the least likely to have destructive issues with these activities.

We drove the nine-hour trip to Mississippi on Monday and returned Thursday. Since we both find the modern driving atmosphere somewhat combative, we split the stress of driving. We took his car, which is two years newer and nicer than mine. When it was my turn to drive, I sweated bullets for the first hour while I familiarized myself with his vehicle, afraid I’d wreck and kill us both.

In hindsight, dying seemed like a better option to his backseat-driving. I haven’t been that scrutinized since my parents first taught me how to drive. He eventually relaxed enough to lean back into the seat and close his eyes for a bit, then we both got some rest and peace.

They comped us for two of the three nights. The hotel reminded me a lot of being on a cruise ship with a number of shops and restaurants. You wouldn’t have to leave the facility, if you didn’t want to. I think that’s their goal.

We each got massages and I got a pedicure. Only my second ever. I usually do it myself every two weeks and have a habit of painting outside the lines. I blame it on the nagging sleep issues—I have no patience for detailed work like that.

We spent less money than we did during the two days at the beach hotel after the wedding. His brother teased him about winning so little at craps, because he’s too conservative and doesn’t bet big enough. I actually like that about him. You have to keep in mind when you go to the table with a set amount, you’re playing with the casino’s money when you’re winning.

I reminded Dean of that and to pretend when he’s up, like he’s playing with Monopoly money. But Dean feels every dollar, so the effects of the pep talk were short lived.

*           *           *

I wore an inexpensive silver and brass band as a wedding ring during the trip. (You can see the ring in the photos above.) I told Dean he could’ve just gotten me something like that instead. “But then you introduced me to diamonds.”

“Don’t tell me that now!” He said.

Because the engagement ring, which is the most expensive part, is a family heirloom, I reminded him again that he got off cheap.

We picked up the soldered wedding ring set after returning from Biloxi.

Dean asked sarcastically, “Finally happy?”

I said, “I was happy before the ring,” then reminded him of the simple band idea and he cringed.

We spent a lot of time just staring at the ring and how it catches the light. I love it. I’m also fond of his wedding band with ocean waves etched onto the outer surface. Perfect for a lifelong surfer.

Lam 3:25—The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. (KJV)


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